To Love Like This (A Poem for Nadja)
By Jolivette Anderson © 11/2/06

As the sun breaks through the night
Turning it to dawnI open my eyes.
The shadow of her small hand
slowly sweeps across my vision
I feel the gentleness of her touch
Caressing my cheek
Making sure it is me, her Mama.
Then, comes the whispers
The coos that sound like a song
A conversation she has with herself and
other spirits in the room
Me included
She is her own person
I, simply a caretaker of her life
until she takes courage and control of her destiny

Fear sometimes consumes me
But it only lasts a fleeting moment
Before courage chases it out of my soul
As long as I breathe, she is protected
As long as I breathe, she is nurtured
As long as I breathe, and beyond….
As she grows, God only knows what her thoughts will be
Will she grow to dislike me and what I stand for
I hope not but I must teach and be strong enough to
Let her life be hers when the time comes
We all must learn to make our own decisions

Until then, the gentleness of her hand
Small and fragile on my cheek
While dawn is peeping in the window
Is what I consider a blessing
This is the image that is permanently burned into my memory
To love like this
Is the closest thing I have ever seen that resembles God

Her name,
Nadja!